Right… My favorite “promise” so far was the Tesla SpaceX edition (with rocket boosters or microjets or some shit, IDK doesn’t make sense) and die-hard fans defending this PR stunt as “the car that might fly”.

lol right. tesla cars can’t even tell the difference between a painting on a wall and the actual road.

It’s irrelevant because I’m never buying anything that piece of shit touches.

lol they can’t even drive from the factory to the parking lot in their fremont facility.

Next thing they’ll “say it will do your taxes and walk your dog”. Seriously this company is so unserious.

I don’t want to be caught dead driving one of those fucking nazimobiles. I would not take one even if it were free.

No it won’t. I’d never my money on anything supporting that fascist pig.

kinda like elon would put a man on mars in 10 years back in 2011.

‘this year’

Sure, Elon. Lets get you back to bed.

… from the Tesla factory floor, through the ditches, crash through several loony tunes landscapes, over your neighbors’ dogs, cats, pet turtles, children, and finally park inside of your house after crashing through your living room wall to add an additional car port you didn’t know you needed! Here at Tesla, we insist cameras are superior in every way possible to LIDAR. Quality is significantly improved on object detection when paired with 3M MAXIMUM EXTREME Quality Blue Tape+ for a premium cost. Every new purchase comes with a free, permanently center dash mounted Hitl -I mean- Elon bobble head performing the awkward “throwing much love” gesture. 3M Blue tape non transferable upon sale of the vehicle. Tesla retains the rights to not be held responsible for any damages resulting in your choice of using personalized automated delivery. Void where prohibited, which is nowhere. CALL NOW!

I ain’t buying that piece of shit if it offers blowjobs.

Earnings call is today

LOL my Tesla? Nonono. The possibility of me ordering a Tesla would require so much leadership refactoring at Tesla, I’m confident this is no longer a possibility.

To put it more sussinctly:

Fuck off with this bullshit ad headline. I wouldn’t touch these swasticars if they jerked me off nightly

Bullshit.

FSD is getting people killed and somehow this same car will get any kind of “ok” to solo drive to someone’s home from the factory?

More promises by Muskrat that aren’t gonna happen.

Probably have a sales rep in the car to monitor the drive.

… Even assuming the self driving tech was actually capable of doing this, which is won’t be…

How would this even make any sense?

Ok, if you live within about 200 to 300 miles of a Tesla factory, … you have this option?

Fremont, California; Sparks, Nevada; Austin, Texas; Buffalo, New York; Lathrop, California.

Outside of 250 miles ish of one of those places? No self driving delivery for you.

… And I am pretty surr not all models are made at all those locations.

Despite long ago claiming his EVs and charger network would be capable of automatically recharging or battery swapping themselves… to make a long distance journey… that … doesn’t exist, he abandoned all of that.

Even funnier: Imagine a tesla self driving from the as of yet to be completed gigafactory in Monterrey Mexico… through the border checkpoint.

The auto charger network doesn’t exist, the car would murder people, cause an accident or fucking explode in the border queue… and even if none of that happened… how in the fuck is a self driving car gonna get through a militarized border crossing?

If he just gives himself a waiver via DOGE for his cars… congrats Elon, you are now a drug trafficker / arms smuggler, whether you know it or not.

… fucking lunacy.