• anachrohack@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    If the person is well known to me, I would say he/she (if that’s their pronouns), not the 3rd person “they”

    • Soup@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Oh, to be there when you say “they” haha

      Or to watch you struggle to force yourself to say he/she so I “lose”.

      It’s ok, we’ve only been doing it for hundreds of years; it’s just a passing fad, right?

      • anachrohack@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        I feel like you’re obtusely ignoring the difference in context between how the non-binary “they” is used (which is a new phenomenon) and how the 3rd person of indefinite gender “they” is used

        • Soup@lemmy.world
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          20 hours ago

          Oh, go on then, explain it. I’d love to hear the nuanced differences between these two uses of 3rd person singular “they” for when he or she are not possible to use.

          • anachrohack@lemmy.world
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            20 hours ago

            I feel like you haven’t read anybody else’s comments other your own, because I and others have already explained it

            • Soup@lemmy.world
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              19 hours ago

              You so very very much did not. The only difference is that you simply don’t want to make a non-binary person comfortable.

              There is absolutely no rule in the English language that states that if you know someone’s biological sex(of which there are more than two but let’s keep it simple) you must use the corresponding he/him/his or she/her/hers pronouns for them. You can 100% use “they” in reference to your own damn mother if you wanted to, it’s all above board.

              So, please, explain the difference between the two things you mentioned before. I’m simply dying to hear what you have to say.

              • anachrohack@lemmy.world
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                19 hours ago

                Youre actually wrong - I never said I dont use they/them pronouns for people who prefer it; I only said that it doesnt come off the tongue very naturally. It forces a pause in thought because it feels grammatically incorrect.

                But to answer your request, here’s a comment I wrote earlier that you quite obviously didn’t bother to read before replying to it:

                Singular they feels natural as a 3rd person pronoun for a party whose gender is unknown. When using it to describe a known person, it feels like you’re talking about an unknown person even though you do know them.

                So, yes, I did say this before. You just chose not to read it, because you so desperately want to be mad at people on the internet and so you’re fighting battles that aren’t there

                • Soup@lemmy.world
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                  19 hours ago

                  But explain how this is different in an actual grammatical sense.

                  Yes, it is incredibly minorly different in how it feels and guess what, it gets easier if you stop moaning about it and just lean into it. I simply refer to most people as “they” now and it both hasn’t caused any communication breakdowns and it’s made it super easy to not slip-up. Barely any mistakes these days, and it really didn’t take that long.

                  You’re making such a big deal out of it and for what?

                  • anachrohack@lemmy.world
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                    19 hours ago

                    I feel that you’re the one making a big deal about it. I’ve already agreed to behave according to your rules - but obedience isn’t enough for you. You require full on ideological purity as well. If someone tells you “yes i will use your preferred pronouns but bear with me since it doesnt feel grammatically correct, but im playing along because it causes less strife” why isn’t that enough for you?