• Una@europe.pub
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    2 days ago

    It’s funny how conservatives use “let children play with what they want, and wear what they want don’t make them trans” when talking against trans people, but when they cross us out of all equations then they become mad at femboys, possibly tomboys. Like, they themselves don’t let kids be kids and wear what they want. They are the ones who set all those gender norms and force people to put themselves into small boxes

    • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      I’m old enough to remember how conservatives reacted to gender noncomforming people. You were an otherwise very masculine man with long hair for metalhead reasons? They were literally afraid you were “one of those weird gays, who go through surgery, to look like a woman, to convert straight men into homosexuality”, and at worst lashed out in violent fashion.

  • cerebralhawks@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 days ago

    Yeah, I don’t know why this is a debate. LGBTQ+ ally my whole life, though I’m cis/straight myself.

    I almost get it. Like the fear that you hook up with a girl and she has boy parts. It’s not really reasonable but it’s a common male fear, I guess. Like she’s gonna be so convincingly female, so perfectly female presenting but she hasn’t had the bottom surgery. I think that’s kind of a fantasy, because pass as the sex a trans person feels isn’t as easy as cisgendered people think it is. I have trans (MTF) friends, and they do not pass well. Oh, I fully accept that they are women; what I don’t do is assume I’m entitled to every female body, or for the female bodies I have access to, to fit into my potentially narrow view (it’s not narrow, but if it were) of what makes a woman attractive. At the end of the day, she’s a person and her body is what it is, take her — as a complete person — or don’t, but don’t waste her time and definitely don’t think you can shame her for it. And it absolutely don’t mean she’s any less a woman. That, I do feel strongly about.

    Also, I’ve known a couple tomboys, girls I grew up around who weren’t conventionally pretty, who liked to play and fight with the boys (and they’d kick your ass, too), and the older adults said “oh yeah that’s a baby butch right there” and later, when trans people became more visible to us (I’d say late 90s early 00s), the assumption that she’s gonna transition. Going on like 30 years later, they’re still girls and they’re still straight (and the one I’m thinking of, definitely wears the pants in the relationship, her guys tend to be kinda meek) but that doesn’t mean she’s gay or trans. Oh, plenty of LGBTQ+ in the family, but you can’t say because a girl doesn’t like pink and doesn’t like dresses that she’s lesbian or trans. It doesn’t work that way. But as her peer, as her playmate, and often as one whose ass she’d kick, I didn’t care. I love her for the person she is, not for the box society puts her in, or checks for her. And if she did bring home a girlfriend, or if she did tell me she never felt like a girl and was going to transition… my sister (not really but like a sister to me) would be my brother or whatever and that would be okay with me, whatever the case, and I’d have their back regardless.

  • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Yup. Having said that, the transition from one sex to another takes more effort than the one from pre-MAGA American to Trumpian fascism. Racism, xenophobia, exceptionalism and a complete lack of empathy and care for your fellow human beings are part of the American DNA (and go ask the Natives if you disagree). 😓

    • DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works
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      2 days ago

      Racism, xenophobia

      a complete lack of empathy and care for your fellow human beings are part of the American DNA

      Wtf even is “American DNA” lol

      Humans are all like this

      • SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        2 days ago

        Wtf even is “American DNA”

        A figurative, not literal, expression referring to an aspect of the cultural heritage of the United States. It’s not an uncommon expression, although it’s a bit dated. It’s also not an exclusive statement, so I’m not sure what you think you’re arguing.

      • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        If you think humans are all like this, you’ve lost the plot and are a misanthrope! But some cultures’ ideologies definitely glorify violence, racial superiority, ‘might makes right’, ‘f you, I got mine’, etc., not all. All humans have the capacity to be evil, of course, but only some tribes elevate it and make it their ideological cornerstones.

        • DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works
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          2 days ago

          Recognizing that human nature have a tendency to become evil is not misanthropy, its reality. I’m still rooting for humanity, but I also acknowledge the harsh reality of evil.

          There are still a lot of countries against minority rights, not just “America”.

          • YappyMonotheist@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            “LGBT+ rights” wasn’t what I was talking about but yes, I agree, people are violent and intolerant for other reasons elsewhere too. I mean, a friend of mine had to escape North Africa cause lesbians can face jail time in her country (for “religious reasons”, ofc), which is evidently fucked, what can I say.