• SuluBeddu@feddit.it
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    2
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    4 hours ago

    Yeah… you see, exactly because people who think like you exist, women have to look for clues right away that they are not going to date a misogynist…

    Women need protection when meeting with strangers, basically all women have life experience that make them feel they need it. I’m sure you as a guy are able to take no for an answer, but your date doesn’t know that yet, and it takes just one guy who doesn’t to ruin a woman’s dating experience and possibly her health and safety.

    I do know women who don’t feel that need, but that’s mostly because they are ignoring their own and their friends’ past experiences. It’s their choice ofc, but it’s universally accepted among women that it’s not a strange thing to do, in fact is the safest thing to do.

    If some women then abuse that need to try to freeride, it’s another discussion, and as a guy I would simply drop the date if I were in that situation. But the need exists, it is valid, and not validating this need to your date will raise a red flag.

    • BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      2 hours ago

      If some women then abuse that need to try to freeride, it’s another discussion,

      No, it’s not “another discussion,” it’s the very discussion that OP wanted to have when he wrote his post.

      Everybody wants to talk about women looking for “Red Flags,” and I don’t blame that at all for doing that, but men have just as much right to look for Red Flags as well. They may not be the same Red Flags, women obviously have more safety concerns (justifiably), but men have to watch out for women whose only interest in dating them is to financially exploit them, which is a far more common occurrence than a sexual assault.

      We all have the right to refuse to be exploited. She can insist on bringing a chaperone, but he shouldn’t be expected to pay for her, and if that’s a deal-breaker, than it becomes pretty clear that they were only interested in taking advantage of him.