Phew, at least the SpaceX branded ketamine got through.
Wow! I wonder what will happen to those 178kgs of cocaine they found!
It wouldn’t even surprise me if some of the 150kg of cocaine went missing.
Someone really ought to take care of the 120 kg of cocaine.
80 kilos of cocaine is quite a lot, it really should be disposed of safely.
The Reverend Horton Heat prophesise!
Well there goes Elon’s Doordash. Definitely not getting that $10 tip now.
This is ridiculous.
Elon never tips.
Not entirely true, he’ll tip if you carry his baby to term. Sometimes he’ll even tip in horses.
I’m sorry?
I remember when a business jet packed to the gills with cocaine crashed and when they investigated, it turned out to be owned by a CIA shell company and previously used to shuttle people to Guantanamo for torture after an extraordinary rendition
Oh my god still? Cocaine isn’t cool anymore. Fent is more profitable to move. What the hell? Was The Deserter right?
I thought no fucking way they found over 7000lb of cocaine on a little business jet but yeah, that Gulfstream could probably barely take off with that much on board. That’s one badass airframe.
Maximum payload is 1.5t but the fuel payload is 12t so 3t of cocaine barely scratches it
!bitchimaplane
Hi aplane, I’m dad.
Federal police are still investigating whether the aircraft was involved in drug trafficking
Um…
Just Teddy still funding those wars in South America.
Maybe it was just for personal use
- Kash Patel on Epstein trafficking girls
Musk’s personal stash
Looks like a whole weeks supply. He’ll be devastated
those tweets are not going to hit the same spot without this
finally an article that’s oniony beyond the headline
It was headed to a Coca-Cola factory. They are adding it back along with real cane sugar.
It was medicinal cocaine!
Musk ain’t getting shit done anytime soon
Let’s hope so!
Musk
he needs cocaine to counteract the effects of his ketamine binges.
He will be even worse when he is coming down!
Guess Elon’s weekly shipment will be late. Probably scrambling to replace it off the streets like some kind of nose-mounted vacuum cleaner.
How much of the product was in the pilot’s system?
That’s this cursed timeline’s equivalent of Mitsubishi MDMA pills
Fuck yeah my guy! You brought back memories…
I wonder if it’s a joke label or not
Some drug traffickers use existing brands to “market” themselves.
Here’s some Afghan heroin seized and destroyed by the international coalition on the Arabian Sea in 2021:
I was about to say, who would ever brand their cocaine, whether it was actually SpaceX or some random cartel? I would get the “brand identification” argument at the end user stage, but marking your bulk shipment of drugs just seems dumb.
Any other company and I’d probably go yeah, the dealers did that, but I wholeheartedly believe Tesla has a cocaine manufacturing department.
This one being fake doesn’t prevent a real one from existing.
I only get that Johnny Chimpo branded stuff. It’s Afghanistanimation!
Id ride in a bently, I wouldnt ride in a spacex or tesler
It’s real. I used to buy Nike brand ecstasy all the time.
If you have a Nike store in your town, I recommend you go in and ask for the triple stacks.
