It’s not self defeating, it’s an implicit understanding of unstated social context. In the comic, the direct leadup was talking about jobs when the question was asked. In the comic it was as direct context as possible without wording the question better.
99.99% of the time, people mean “What do you do for a living?”, and if they don’t and you wrongly assume they do, they can easily follow up with “Cool, and what do you do for fun/in your free time?”. Conversation stays flowing with no hitches.
If you want to change the general unstated social context (and I agree that we definitely should) don’t be abrasive/elitist/well ackshually with a person making small talk. Don’t introduce that hitch where you talk down to your conversation partner. That’s a great way to slam the brakes on any conversation.
If I was the asker in the comic, I’d be sorely tempted to start talking about the bodily functions that I do. If we’re gonna have a pedantry competition, I’m gonna win.
Anyway, you can introduce or specify the context of your answer with statements like “Well, to pay the bills I […], but I just do that so I can […]”. You can even reverse the order there so what fulfills you is the first answer. Keep things smooth.
That works for asking as well. I avoid the generic “What do you do?”. For me it’s always “So how do you spend your free time?” or “What do you enjoy doing?” for what brings them fulfillment. “What do you do for a living?” for what their job is. I specify.
Your job is still something you do, so just set the subcategory.
And like so many of these “and then everybody clapped” style of comics, that are pretty obviously a creator imagining a version of a real life event but where they were “cooler”…
If anyone was knocked silent by that response, it would only be from shock that you missed the context and then willfully doubled down on it.
That look wouldn’t be a moment of epiphany or something. It would be “Well great, I’m talking to someone lacking in social graces.”
Most people would respond by taking the conversation in the new direction of hobbies, or just correct the misunderstanding and ask what they did for a living to continue the original track.
You’re acting like she didn’t know the intended response was to talk about one’s self in terms of employment. This isn’t a lack of social understanding - its a difference in life priorities and self value.
It’s not self defeating, it’s an implicit understanding of unstated social context. In the comic, the direct leadup was talking about jobs when the question was asked. In the comic it was as direct context as possible without wording the question better.
99.99% of the time, people mean “What do you do for a living?”, and if they don’t and you wrongly assume they do, they can easily follow up with “Cool, and what do you do for fun/in your free time?”. Conversation stays flowing with no hitches.
If you want to change the general unstated social context (and I agree that we definitely should) don’t be abrasive/elitist/well ackshually with a person making small talk. Don’t introduce that hitch where you talk down to your conversation partner. That’s a great way to slam the brakes on any conversation.
If I was the asker in the comic, I’d be sorely tempted to start talking about the bodily functions that I do. If we’re gonna have a pedantry competition, I’m gonna win.
Anyway, you can introduce or specify the context of your answer with statements like “Well, to pay the bills I […], but I just do that so I can […]”. You can even reverse the order there so what fulfills you is the first answer. Keep things smooth.
That works for asking as well. I avoid the generic “What do you do?”. For me it’s always “So how do you spend your free time?” or “What do you enjoy doing?” for what brings them fulfillment. “What do you do for a living?” for what their job is. I specify.
Your job is still something you do, so just set the subcategory.
And like so many of these “and then everybody clapped” style of comics, that are pretty obviously a creator imagining a version of a real life event but where they were “cooler”…
If anyone was knocked silent by that response, it would only be from shock that you missed the context and then willfully doubled down on it.
That look wouldn’t be a moment of epiphany or something. It would be “Well great, I’m talking to someone lacking in social graces.”
Most people would respond by taking the conversation in the new direction of hobbies, or just correct the misunderstanding and ask what they did for a living to continue the original track.
You’re acting like she didn’t know the intended response was to talk about one’s self in terms of employment. This isn’t a lack of social understanding - its a difference in life priorities and self value.