In my head it was definitely Cave.

I know the “attack helicopter” bit is a transphobic trope, but given how hard those fans are probably working, I think this computer might actually identify as one.

(If this comment is offensive I can remove it/mod can obviously remove it — not trying to be a dick!)

Yep, you’re right — I was just responding to parent’s comment about fiber being best because nothing is faster than light :)

That’s…not really a cogent argument.

Satellites connect to ground using radio/microwave (or even laser), all of which are electromagnetic radiation and travel at the speed of light (in vacuum).

Light in a fiber travels much more slowly than in vacuum — light in fiber travels at around 67% the speed of light in vacuum (depends on the fiber). In contrast, signals through cat7 twisted pair (Ethernet) can be north of 75%, and coaxial cable can be north of 80% (even higher for air dielectric). Note that these are all carrying electromagnetic waves, they’re just a) not in free space and b) generally not optical frequency, so we don’t call them light, but they are still governed by the same equations and limitations.

If you want to get signals from point A to point B fastest (lowest latency), you don’t use fiber, you probably use microwaves: https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2016/11/private-microwave-networks-financial-hft/

Finally, the reason fiber is so good is complicated, but has to do with the fact that “physics bandwidth” tends to care about fractional bandwidth (“delta frequency divided by frequency”), whereas “information bandwidth” cares about absolute bandwidth (“delta frequency”), all else being equal (looking at you, SNR). Fiber uses optical frequencies, which can be hundreds of THz — so a tiny fractional bandwidth is a huge absolute bandwidth.

80% of the USA lives within urban areas (source). Urban “fiberization” is absolutely within reach.

Agree that running fiber out to very remote areas is tricky, but even then it’s probably not prohibitive for all but the most remote locations.

Yes, but you’re not alone (my partner tends this way).

So the irony is

I see what you did there…

“Can you hold it” was meant as “abstain from pooping for just a little longer,” but was instead interpreted as, “poop, and then hold the poop in your hands.”

I think you mean more scrupulous, not less.

If you lose power, you can use one of these cables to power your house (or at least, the part of your house on that phase).

This is not how you should do this, but it can work. It is not a good idea (possibly illegal?).

Hopefully you can publish in an open-access journal — if not it would be great if you could share an arXiv preprint :)

You said that no one…

I don’t think that was the parent commenter though…

You experience the passage of time as ever increasing in speed, and before long the universe has died, leaving you — immortal and sentient — alone in the cold, dead cosmos, for eternity.

Bonus points: use non-qwerty keyboard for added obfuscation (but keep the qwerty key caps of course).

It’s nerf or and nuttin’

FTFY

It is really powerful per watt, and has a built-in UPS. Any homelab type things you could do with that? macOS+homebrew will give you a nice *NIX feel, very familiar if you’re a Linux user.

I’m a fan of having a remote homelab computer+disk for off-site storage. This would be a good candidate in that it wouldn’t use excessive power at a friend/family’s place, but may be overkill (I use a pi3 for that).

Hah not at all! I need to remind myself to hydrate and fuel constantly if I’m doing any sort of exercise.

If you’re exercising and you drink because you’re thirsty, you probably waited too long to hydrate.

This type of thing is the nominal purpose of credit scores, I believe. (Whether they’re implemented effectively is another story…)

Note re: mustard. It is not just an “other flavor,” it is also an emulsifier!

It took me a while before I learned this. Even if you’re not going for a mustardy flavor, a little mustard goes a long way in keeping the oil and vinegar from separating. Definitely recommend using some with basically every dressing you make.