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Bet, I think that’s a really good point and a crucial reminder for some people.
I am gonna need 15 year olds to be 33% less annoying, though, in return. I mean, I was incredibly annoying at 15 and I get it’s hard not to be but goddamn meet me part way here
Man… The amount of comments saying that kids are dumb at fifteen and I didn’t know what I was doing at fifteen are all falsely equating respect with success and knowledge. Kids literally don’t know what their doing because they are figuring it out. They’re not dumb, they have a lot to learn. And most want to.
Kids need respect for being who they are. You give most kids real respect and watch them do everything they can to live up to it. They need real connection and mentors. When you give high support then you can set high expectations.
Kids need respect
no, kids need understanding. respect is earned. the difference between the two is trust.
You talk like all the adults that made life hell when I was 15. If anyone has to “earn” respect, it’s adults who forgot what it’s like to live under someone else’s thumb.
you talk like a petulant child that was never pushed to achieve more than you thought you were capable of.
how’s that feel?
I remember every moment of my life. I remember being 10 months old laying in my crib smelling the herb garden out the window. I remember my parents never showing up to any of my school events. I remember the way the belt across my back and thighs felt when my father got home from a “hard day”. I remember spending the weekend in jail because I was doing something my father made me do.
fuck you, asshole.
I never earned respect from them while they were alive. I didn’t even get any understanding from them. I only got yelled at, hit, and verbally abused when they felt they were losing control of their own life. respect is earned through proving you can be trusted with mature tasks. understanding should be given. understanding that a child may know to take out the trash but not know the importance of it. this makes it difficult for them to prioritize and objectively complete goals.
children need understanding from adults, to provide guidance that allows them to grow on their own power and lean on when they need support.
next time you want to attack someone based on who they are, take the entitled prick out of your mouth before you speak, asshole.
Respect is granted for just being human. That can be erode if they violate core social norms, but when respect is given trust is given back. They then give the effort that results in learning.
respect for life is not respect for the individual.
trust must exist before respect is given. let me give you an example.
a cop pulls you over, you were not breaking any laws that you were aware of. the officer walks up and asks you if you know why you were pulled over. you tell him no and he proceeds to tell you that you were speeding.
you know this was a lie since you had speed control on.
did you respect the officer before or after he pulled you over?
did your level of respect change before or after he lied to you?
in my case, I never respected the officer. I understand that he’s doing a job and will help however I can. However, after he lies to me I could never trust him, thus I could never respect him.
my point is, In order for respect to exist, trust must be present first. I don’t trust strangers, even if they’re in positions of public trust.
You are right though. Respect and trust correlate to each other and fortify each other. The more trust you have in someone, the more respect you have for them, the more respect you have for someone, the more trust you have in them.
I can still trust somebody, but I can still not respect them. that relationship cannot be flipped around.
I don’t respect cops to begin with. If I didn’t know they were a cop then I would respect them.
because you don’t trust them, right?
Teenagers are in development of becoming an individual. They may have personalities, but they haven’t tempered them for society yet. That tempering process is through human connections. I’d argue the best outcomes come through respect, patient connections with adults who demonstrate composure and allow them to grow that composure.
I don’t know what you’re suggesting other than with holding respect.
Teenagers are in development of becoming an individual. They may behave personalities, but they haven’t tempered them for society yet.
that’s exactly my point. I understand they have to be tempered by society. Once they have achieved this level of tempering it’s respectable for the amount of effort they put in. some people though, never get through that tempering and I cannot respect them. I understand they may have social anxiety or some other reason, but I can’t trust them like others that have so I can’t respect them like others. there are other ways to respect though.
I’d argue the best outcomes come through respect, patient connections with adults who demonstrate composure and allow them to grow that composure.
IMO that’s not respect, thats understanding. If you respected them, you would at least seem them as equals to yourself and treat them as an equal. You understand they aren’t at the same level as yourself and give them some leeway to “feel it out” and find their own path. this includes supporting them when they make mistakes or explaining how to avoid the mistakes in the future.
I don’t know what you’re suggesting other than with holding respect.
respect is a gift given from one individual to another. it signifies the trust one has in the other. A child respects a parent because they trust the parent. when the trust is broken, the respect dies with it. infact, respect of an adult is important to the development of a young mind and is a mechanism used to emulate the adult. if you respect someone, you might want to try being like them, even when you’re an adult.
so in short, I disagree that respect should be given automatically. It’s earned through nurturing relationships and built on trust.
I work at a pet store. I monitor anyone that looks between 12 and 18 closely. If I don’t, without fail they’re always the ones swatting at our animals for a laugh. Why, by Neptune’s briny piss, would I treat them with the respect that 9/10 times they don’t show to anyone else?
“I’m 20 and this is deep”.
Become an actual adult and you will realize how ridiculously difficult it is to take some uneducated teenager’s radicalism with any grain of seriousness and respect. Even if you try to because you remember what it felt like not to be taken seriously, and you don’t want to be that adult…
I’m 35, and I’m perfectly able to engage with the thought process behind the opinion, no matter how radical. All they want is to be treated with respect.
Contrast with “real adults” who e.g. continue to trash the planet because they can’t even think of slightly decreasing the amount by which they enrich themselves. Those I don’t respect. They are the real radicals.
If a 15 year old says “so much good can happen when a few billionaires kick the bucket”, I’m right there with them.
Man, that is not what most 15 year olds are saying. You have an idealized fantasy in your head. Most of them are just spewing obscenities, racism and stupid incel/manosphere shit over discord. Just like we were over IRCs, ventrillo and TeamSpeak.
Most kids are fucking stupid.
I had Climate Change anxiety when I was 15. I’m an adult now and I have crippling Climate Change anxiety and can’t do anything without feeling guilty. I hate the adults that sabotage my education because they decided I had a learning disability. If anyone said problematic shit, it was my conservative history teacher.
I don’t think the average person on lemmy, with a diagnosed learning disability or other challenges (autism in my case), represent the average opinion of 15 year old children.
Judging by the state of the world, I don’t think the average adult has any right to have a feeling of smug superiority to teenagers. I don’t think there’s really that much difference between average teenagers and average adults.
Adults can be immature, but children cannot be mature.
Greta Thunberg and how Americans react to her proves why mature children in America are a rarity.
I thought like this when I was 15.
Then in my twenties looking back at how I acted when I was a teen I thought “I was really dumb as a kid, I wish I had more supervision from a responsible adult.”
Now in my thirties looking back at how I acted when I was in my twenties I think “I was really dumb as a kid, I wish I had more supervision from a responsible adult.”
Kids today deserve the option to delete everything about the from the Internet at some point in their 20s. No one needs video evidence of that phase.
My bro has a rule: no public photos of his kids, ever. Shared to family, privately, only.
They’re just not old enough to sign away their privacy.
I’m sad that so many people had such a shit time being 15.
I had a great time being 15. Back then I couldn’t even fathom being twenty, it felt like being old and I was never getting old (or so my 15yo self thought)
reading this has the weird sensation of being brainwashed into a cult
