Me, as a child: “I want to eat four KitKats at once.”
My parents: “You’ll give yourself a tummy ache and spend the rest of the day puking and shitting.”
Me, as an adult: puking and shitting noises
Fuck Nestle, Kit Kats are made by Nestle.
I’ve resigned myself to having to only Fuck Nestle on most of their products. Perfect is the enemy of good.
I don’t think there is any Nestle product I need
Based.
The other side to that is realizing how sick you feel after eating three giant KitKats
Doesn’t matter. The fourth will put it right.
Goddammit I originally put four and then edited to three LMAO
And the fifth brings you back to upset tummy.
Shortly after moving out on my own I realized I could just buy broccoli and steam it and eat it whenever I want. Keep in mind I LOOOOOVED steamed broccoli; especially with lemon juice and butter.
I have binged on candy and felt awful afterwards but never in my life have I felt as miserable as I did the night after I ate a whole head of broccoli. The trapped gas in my abdomen literally made me wish I was dead.
…and my dumb ass had to do this twice before before I made the connection…
…that’s mostly due to it being undercooked (or cooked-just-right in my opinion), which i learned the hard way after binging on a giant bag and fearing i needed to rush to the hospital until an absurdly-long-winded bout of flatulence relieved the pressure…
…if you overcook your broccoli it doesn’t have the same effect…
Dude, you know what’s worse than trapped gas from broccoli? Trapped broccoli. Be careful.
Well being an adult is taking a giant bite through a bunch of giant kitkats, then putting the rest away for another day.
Just wait until you realise there are FOUR Kit Kats in the image!
I think there’s actually five, haha
Next comes the realization you can also buy quality treats.
But being an adult is realizing those choices are accommodated by consequences. Like all your friends giving you shit for being ‘lol random’.
But being an adult is realizing those choices are accommodated by consequences
No! I specifically ordered my increased autonomy without any adulting! I demand a replacement or a refund!
Refund granted and adult status revoked. Credits were added to your adult account, which requires you to be an adult to sign in! Have a good day. :)
At least you can decide for yourself if you want to accept those consequences.
Then you feel like trash the next morning because you starved your body of proper nutrition. If continued long term, you become a fat diabetic.
If your body reacts this way from eating too many sweets once, then your problem started weeks before.
The human body needs way less nutrients than people generally assume.
If I ate something like this, I’d feel awful in a matter of minutes, probably about 30. Oh, it would taste awesome until then.
I’m not diabetic, but hypoglycemia sucks balls. I can’t even eat a fucking banana unless I’ve just had a meal. 😕
How does a banana give you low blood sugar, and how could eating a meal (= more carbohydrates) help?
Yes, either because of lifestyle choices in general, or a genetic predisposition towards such things, I would assume.
I was 26 before I realised that I could have as much bacon as I wanted whenever I wanted.
Tell that to your arteries at 35.
40 and still doing great!
Nah, not if you eat like this. You prob unhealthy af
Actually, I think I’m doing pretty well for a guy my age. Certainly better than the average. However, I could stand to do better.
I don’t actually eat bacon everyday. Just because I can do something doesn’t mean that I do.
Got any tips for an older gent that’s looking for some gains? Not trying to look like Chris Hemsworth, but a healthy muscle tone would be nice.
They say bring on the crestor lined bacon
I never even thought that i would call someone this, but you have forced me to. YOU BARBARIC!
We still live in a society governed by laws and morals.
Straight to jail.
You’re right, and it’s a jail of diabetes.
The best part about eating kit kats wrong is the look of disgust on everyone’s faces as you do.
There’s no right way to eat a kit kat. Fuck nestle.
My friends sure seem to think there is.
Anyone else just randomly bought a cake and ate the whole thing?
Being an adult isn’t all bad.
…one morning when i was in college, my roommate and i realised we were grown-ups, so we went to the grocery store, bought two tubs of frosting, came back to our apartment, sat down with spoons-in-hand, and watched an afternoon of arthur c. clarke’s myterious world on the sci-fi channel…
(ugh; never again)
…i learned the same lesson chewing a jumbo-pack of fruit stripe all-at-once four years later…
I guess you didn’t learn your lesson then…
I used to have a kit Kat addiction and would eat a whole chocolate block sized bar of the stuff like this
I was in college and loved Arby’s beef and Cheddars. Ordered 5 at the drive through, ate them all within 20 minutes. Oof. I still remember how heavy they were.
…i spent a summer internship working at an office where arby’s curly fries were the only vegetarian food within walking distance; haven’t been able to stomach them since…
What weighs more, 5 Arby’s beef and cheddar or 5 pounds of Tungsten? The 5 Arby’s beef and cheddar, because you also gotta carry the weight of what you did to those Arby’s workers
It’s funny till you been a grown up too long and you get either disgusted or scared of this lol.
