The internet has always been my salvation.
As a socially underdeveloped kid, I’d spend my lunch hours in the high school library on those public desktop computers, reading fandom sites about my favorite video games. Computers always made sense to me. I even owe my entire career to them.
But the internet today feels wrong. Whatever the fuck kind of psychological warfare is happening right now with this Epstein stuff is too much for my mind to handle. I can’t do it anymore.
I will love. I will vote. I will support my community and continue to oppose this fucking nightmarish system we all find ourselves in. But I need to sign off.
Imagine the door closing sound effect when logging out of AIM.
Yeah. There are forums and webpages and ftp sites and bizzaro corners that make me laugh and realize that the old internet that we all miss… Is the authenticity of the human spirit, and not only is that alive and well with an appetite, but vintage and legacy sites are still around.
If you’re missing that era, think back to what you were doing with the internet back then, and try to find places like that now.
One of the reasons now feels so wrong is because of the optics; the few big websites that are everywhere and have us addicted to their platforms and pacing are not authentic, and are focused on growth and now extracting value to please stakeholders, which results in a lot of censorship and normatization and sterilization. But once you search out your places and talk to the people there, I guarantee there’s people with the same drives for not only escaping the traps, but also those common interests. Which is why I can only say that it’s really worth it to search out the places you need to be.
Think back to how you found the places you used to love and gave you a sense of freedom and authenticity. Who made those places? What else were you doing in your life?
I literally just talked to a stranger on a platform earlier today about this that I ran into. They were still there, still doing the same thing that they were doing in the early 2000s. Obviously, they’re 20 years older and live in reality. But, their and my common interest aligned and purpose came from it.
Another reason I think now feels so wrong is because of shame. There’s a LOT of shame in current internet culture and real life. People calling things cringe, etc. This results in a huge lack of both originality in expression and thought. Imagine if you walked up to a busker and said something like “bro, you’re fucking cringe and chopped”. Like what an insanely toxic way to stomp out the fun and color of not only that person, but yourself and anybody witnessing that. Let people be fucking weird and embarrassing and gross and predictable and whatever. We’re all human, everybody has their own experiences. Less shame, more weirdness.
Obviously, there are other huge, depressing forces at work. But regardless of those forces at play and if they end up completely ruining everything or not, this is our life, this is your life, this is your only shot at enjoying all the things being alive has to offer…
GO FIND YOUR PEOPLE! THEY ARE OUT THERE!
The Internet is a very, very large and deep and complex place, with all kinds of history and cultures and subcultures and movements and niches, out in the open, hidden, and not so hidden. It’s not just for porn. It’s not just for consuming. And if you don’t like something about it, you can make something new :o