• phlegmy@sh.itjust.works
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    1 day ago

    I feel like there’s too many poly relationship structures to be able to generalise them all like that.

    There’s plenty of people who have open relationships, where two people have a very close relationship (sometimes married) but they aren’t sexually exclusive with each other.

    I’d also wager that some poly relationship structures would be more stable for lgbt people rather than heterosexual people, solely on the idea that everyone could participate more equally.

    • HelixDab2@lemm.ee
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      20 hours ago

      None of what I said is restricted to any specific form of multiamorous relationship, or any sexual orientation or gender identity/expression. Most of the people trying to engage in polyerotic relationships–by which I mean the overwhelming majority–are people that have signed up for an ultramarathon before they can successfully complete a 5k fun run.

      • phlegmy@sh.itjust.works
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        17 hours ago

        We’re really just sharing opinions though, not facts.

        I haven’t found any solid evidence that poly relationships are inherently more difficult or prone to failure than monogamous relationships. Long-lasting relationships are just hard in general.

        • HelixDab2@lemm.ee
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          10 hours ago

          My opinion is strictly anecdotal; I’m not a professional, I can only speak to what I’ve personally seen, and that may or may not be representative.

          OTOH, if sex and relationship counselors are saying that the overwhelming majority of people are doing multiamory badly, then their opinions have a lot more weight. Are they necessarily correct? No, of course not, any more than the opinion of any one doctor could be full of shit (see also: any doctor that thinks trans-ideology is a woke-mind virus, or whatever they’re saying now). But it has a lot more weight than opinions of non-professionals.

          • phlegmy@sh.itjust.works
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            9 hours ago

            Are most relationship counselors saying that though?
            Like you said, professionals can be wrong, but I’d still be interested in knowing what the general consensus is.

            I guess it’s hard to know without surveying them all.