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Yall ever see vance without a beard? It’s hilarious, he chubby af. I believe they make him wear a beard so he doesn’t look like the Gerber baby sponsored by mabyline
Yeah but he’s pounding Ozempic now. As regulated by his owners.
JD Vance was actually a model for the Gerber Babyfood label.
Lololl. That’s perfect. Man they started him early in a long career as a professional pretty boy
JD Vance is Vice President of The United States and somehow he is still a loser. Like not a bad person, of course JD is an awful, hateful human… I mean JD Vance genuinely firehoses out loser vibes everywhere he goes despite on paper being an immensely powerful boy (one of the most powerful boys!).
He’s so bland and draining that the pope died hours after a Vance Exposure Event.
I hypothesize that if the entire nation is subjected to a VEE, we could face devastating losses.
the pope died hours after a Vance Exposure Event.
Yet, somehow, Trump hasn’t succumbed (yet) to extended exposure to Vance.
If he takes over he’s going to have a hard time. People won’t follow him blindly like they do for trump. He’s going to try to be tough but it will be so cringy that he won’t get the support he needs to back it up.
Who knows, I still can’t understand how people can take Trump seriously, let alone form a cult following.
People like trump because he lies in such a playful way. It softens it enough that most of his followers let it slide and the rest are outright fooled by it. Vance does not have this quality. His lies come across as hateful and intentional. People aren’t left feeling good afterwards like when trump lies to them.
“It’s worth the cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths […] so that we can have the Second Amendment” - Charlie Kirk, 2023
That’s why I say ‘hey man, nice shot.’
Zombie kill of the week.
…for everything else, there’s MasterCard.
But not for “erotica featuring animal related topics”, so since you bought that catgirl hentai game on Steam, your cards are revoked for “financially supporting the sexual exploitation of animals”.
How did you know I bought catgirl hentai games on Steam?
You’re on Lemmy
But if you quote Ace Frehley you’ll get a HELL YEAH
… Good thing I use MasterCard
Hhahahahaha
My mom just read me a text message she got from her half-sister who is in stage 4 renal failure (or something imminently fatal like that, although I’ve been hearing this for about 10 years now). I was feeling sorry for her until my mom got to the point where she said she was “looking forward to meeting Jesus and Charlie Kirk”.
Adults with the mental disorder called religion need treatment, preferably medicated to the nostrils.
I would just reply with “Bitch, you’re going to hell, you’re only meeting Charlie Kirk there.”
And Maggie Thatcher and Ronald Reagan. So many conservative herpes!
Edit: I meant to type heroes, but this works too.
I swear, if Hell could be livestreamed on Twitch I bet it would have 500k+ views every day just from people watching Thatcher, Nixon and Reagan burning in there.
“you can meet one, or the other, but not both.”
Ignoring your actual point, something like end-stage renal disease requiring dialysis has a life expectancy of around 5 years, but even 10+ years on dialysis is not unheard of.
FWIW she has refused dialysis.
If she quit, it must’ve been recent. She won’t last more than a couple weeks on average.
As I said when I got a text saying “don’t send A g money to your dad”: “It won’t be long now. Everything evolving him will be over shortly.”
Everyone in his generation was a little miffed. Everyone in my generation was all “yup.”
They really don’t have people on dialysis that long anymore. My best friend is currently on dialysis.
Different sites will have different patient populations, but large cohort data shows 5 year survival rate of ~40% and 10-year survival rate of ~10%. Not common, but not particularly unusual.
something imminently fatal like that, although I’ve been hearing this for about 10 years now
So Charlie Kirk, J. D. Vance, and Donald Trump walk into a gas champer and get raped…
Plot twist, no-one else was in the chamber. They did it to each other.
I’m kinda impressed they managed a triangle of non consent.
“Knock knock.”
“Who’s there?”
“Not Charlie Kirk any more.”That’s it, the freedom committee decided you’re not bald eagle enough and are no longer welcome in the land of cholesterol.
but i was just going to cross the border for my monthly lard pickup
I love stories with happy endings!
This one is a fine joke and makes a point, but let’s not take it farther. Normalizing this nazi shit serves their agenda if it begins to disconnect from one-off commentary on their speech.
Trump by an anal fetishist using his tiny hands as dildos, Vance by a trans man’s neodick and Kirk in the neckhole by… A duck jesus christ I feel like I just invented a sick version of Clue
You’ve always been allowed to threaten the designated groups but not allow to threaten the rulers power.
Soo, are “watermelon people” people who really like watermelon, black Americans, or Oompa Loompas because their skin is kinda like the flesh and the hair is the rind? Or fat folk who wear stripey green onesies
Or gay/queer/trans?
It’s black people
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I thought it was Palestinians, but now that I think about it there’s no way your average American racist can make that connection.
Green on the outside, red on the inside?
If overheating or very sunburnt aha
You get one guess.
Hold on. Wait. I’m sorry… are there yellow watermelons? Since when?
Apparently they exist! I just thought someone scattered a honeydew in the mix. Link
I first had one over 30 years ago from a guy selling fruit from the back of his pickup truck at a campground I was staying at. It was the most amazing watermelon I’ve ever eaten.
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No. But I like where you’re going with it.
I honestly don’t know the answer (though between your options, I give better odds to a single one, even having no idea how they relate)…
But I want to say, all power to us, people who love watermelons!
Unfortunately it’s this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watermelon_stereotype
Edit: On a more positive note, while I knew about this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Watermelon_as_a_Palestinian_symbol I did NOT know about this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kherson_watermelon
Watermelons are quite versatile, it seems.
Thought that would be this video
That dude is awesome on X. I recently followed him and he is hilarious imo.
He’s on Bluesky too. Just fyi, in case you might want to consider not being on Twitter anymore.
X is a cesspool of a lot of right wing BS (I’ve just learned to ignore it) but it also has large groups of people who are interested in basically all of the more niche things that I am interested in. Bluesky, Mastodon, Lemmy, etc. just do not even come remotely close unfortunately.
Well, that might be because their audience is still there, despite everything.
That would be why, yes. Easier to keep communities in one spot than to move them.
Most people do not pay attention to politics which is why we’re in this mess but that’s the way it goes
But then they wouldn’t get this guy’s jokes at all
I refuse believe that people who still use Twitter simply haven’t realised what’s going on and would leave if only someone told them. It’s just not possible to be this isolated. By now, they’re actively ignoring it. They may have valid reasons, idk, but everybody knows.
Same reason I still use reddit. Lemmy is great but the communities on reddit that are on the smaller side are still too small to be viable here.
