Basically, I have this really annoying little fucker in my life who everytime he spots me interacting with people, says this. I’ve interacted with him very few times, so he basically doesn’t even know me.
While I am a little introverted, no one likes this bs.
Start laughing and say: “you kidding me now. Right?” Then keep on laughing, shake your head and change the topic.
I’d either go with “Ok, cool 👍” or just ignore them.
The best way to deal with morons like that is to not pay a lot of attention to their comments.
“I’m asking you, for the final time: please stop stalking me.”
I’ve had decent success with a deadpan stare and asking them to explain what they mean. Adjust your level of feigned stupidity or lack of sense of humour as needed.
“You’ve never heard me speak before? But you said the same thing to me last week when you heard me speak. Don’t you remember that? Is everything ok?”
Some people honestly don’t have a sense of humor, and think their one joke is hilarious even when it’s beaten with a dead horse.
First, assume they’re not doing it to be malicious, and talk to them, say it was funny the first few times, it’s grown old and you’re tired of hearing it. It started off funny, but them saying it every time has switched to hurtful. Hopefully that’s enough to get them to stop.
If they don’t, then don’t blow up, but next time they drop it start saying “Yeah, you said that last time we were together too”, deflect the humor with neutrality. Jokes like that only work if people laugh, and if other people aren’t laughing then usually it stops.
Just don’t blow up. Blowing up sounds like a good idea, but will make you come off as “they can’t take a joke”
Also, if you do decide you need to escalate past this asking them to explain the joke can work really well. It works wonders for bigotry and other issues too, if they say “it’s just a joke” say “I don’t understand, can you please explain the joke?” This makes them articulate their explanation for why they find it funny and chances are they will sound like a complete dingus in front of you and others, heavily disincentivising this behaviour.
Okay, yeah, this is a lot nicer than what I was gonna suggest. OP, go with this.
Embrace and extend.
Or in the conversational sense - agree and escalate to absurdity.
“I know, right? Its the craziest thing that we never talk. Not sure how that happens since we see each other all the time, totally weird. Hey, have you tried these chips? They’re fantastic” and walk them over to something new.
But say it completely genuinely, like you two are in on something together, like it really happens that way.
What you want is to be seen by everyone as being good natured about it, and just having fun. You’re also taking charge of the frame, and changing it.
“Ultra-short-term memory, I know. My aunt has that, too. Have you seen a shrink?”
Oh do shut up with that boring drivel
Just tell them to leave you alone…
If they don’t, then be blunter about it and say it in front of whoever you’re talking to. Make it abundantly clear that you just don’t want to talk to that specific person.
I’d just tell him to shut the fuck up.
