Based on my job obtaining ability in the last year apparently be me.
Fart into an airzooka and shoot the fart at the interviewers.
Oh I did this one once! I interviewed for a job as a construction worker, and my first question was “what’s the pay” and second “how the fuck do you expect anyone to say yes to that”.
They also had an apprentice working on a roof right next to us with absolutely no safety gear in sight.
Hire me or OSHA geta notified if you wanted the job
I had one guy I interviewed tell me, unprompted, that all the women in the company would definitely feel comfortable around him.
Ok???
It was a fast no thank you. So I guess I’d do that
“I am always respectful and appropriate towards female employees, especially the hot ones.”
Sounds like something Michael Scott would say.
First, can you sign this form for my unemployment job search? Thanks bye.
“Hi, I don’t want this job, I’m just here because the job centre told me to apply if I want to continue receiving unemployment benefits.”
Whatever I’ve been doing for the past year, apparently.
Ask for a blow job
As you can clearly see I’m white and male. When do I start?
“Congrats, Mr. President! You’ve won the election!”
How strict is your sexual harassment policy?
Go for the hand shake and then pull a Hitler salute.
Mypillow would hire you on the spot
“Workers of the world, Unite!”
brandishes a hammer and sickle
(Legal Disclaimer: I’m not a communist, I just think this scene would look so funny)
- I only push to
master - I only deploy to prod on Fridays
- I am not available on the weekends
something about your confidence… you’re hired!
Confidence coming from ignorance is human’s biggest trap.
- I only push to
Get my dick out. If it doesn’t ruin the interview I’ll run away anyway - who would want to work in a company where such a behaviour is okay?
